iddah the waiting period, step by step

This week

Only what this week asks, in the order it usually comes. Let others carry the rest.

Tick a step when it’s done. Ticks stay on this page only: nothing is saved, and they clear when you leave.

  1. Where you will sleep tonight

    The iddah is usually kept in the home you shared. If it is not safe or you cannot stay, the schools allow moving.

    Read more: Where you will sleep tonight
  2. Who brings food and does the errands

    Let family and friends cook and run errands this week, so you can rest and grieve.1

    Read more: Who brings food and does the errands
  3. Telling work, and asking for leave

    Some states require bereavement leave, and you can ask for a religious accommodation for the months of your iddah.2

    Read more: Telling work, and asking for leave
  4. The date to count from

    Write down the date he died. If the news reached you later, the ruling page shows what the schools say about counting.

    Read more: The date to count from
  5. The janāzah and the grave

    The schools differ on whether you attend the janāzah or visit the grave. Read what each says.

    Read more: The janāzah and the grave
  6. If you are not safe

    Your safety comes first. Call 911 in danger, or the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.

    Read more: If you are not safe

Sources

  1. 1

    Sunan Abī Dāwūd 3132 · Hasan (Al-Albani)

    Open: Sunan Abī Dāwūd 3132 ↗checked Oct 18, 2026
    Read the passage: source 1

    اصْنَعُوا لآلِ جَعْفَرٍ طَعَامًا فَإِنَّهُ قَدْ أَتَاهُمْ أَمْرٌ شَغَلَهُمْ

    The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: "Prepare food for the family of Ja'far for there came upon them an incident which has engaged them."

  2. 2

    U.S. EEOC, "Religious Discrimination"

    Open: U.S. EEOC, "Religious Discrimination" ↗checked Oct 18, 2026
    Read the passage: source 2

    Unless it would be an undue hardship, an employer must reasonably accommodate an employee's religious beliefs or practices, including "schedule changes or leave for religious observances". Notice on Groff v. DeJoy, 143 S. Ct. 2279 (2023): "more than a de minimis cost" does not establish undue hardship; "undue hardship is shown when a burden is substantial in the overall context of an employer's business".

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